Sunday, December 16, 2012

New Canadian Twenty Dollar Bill - Five Major Errors

There is nothing like our ideas existing in the bodies themselves.
John Locke, An Essay Concerning Human Understanding, p. 87

It was brought to the Oracle of Ottawa's attention today by a young lad cashier in a Chapters store somewhere in Ottawa. As I was paying cash for a gift for my significant other, I was reaching into my pocket for the required amount from a pile of new twenty dollar bills that I just retrieved from an automated cash machine, when I again noticed how much the new twenty's are a lot like the 'Harper Government' of the day, slimy and yet greasy at the same time! When relating my utter disgust and contempt for the new bills the youngster mentioned that the Arms of Canada were nowhere to found on the notes!

The Oracle of Ottawa was aghast! Surely it was worked in somewhere! And the youngster also mentioned that he line "This note is legal tender" was not visible! And for the life of the Oracle of Ottawa the little whipper snapper was correct! This would get more and proper investigation when the Oracle of Ottawa returned to his fortified compound, somewhere in Ottawa - South.

Well the Oracle of Ottawa found the "This Note is Legal Tender" printed in very small letters to the right of the Obverse (i.e. front) of the note in a very small group of letters printed in an elliptical curve. Upon closer inspection, with several different kinds of peepers, the Oracle of Ottawa found FIVE major errors in the bills design! I will innumerate each with an actual real life image. So here we go!

Arms of Canada - Missing...
Error I:  These new polymer banknotes are the first Canadian banknotes in 58 years that do not have the Arms of Canada visible on them!  The arms of Canada are the arms of the Sovereign and signify national sovereignty and ownership. They also act as an easy security feature. Is the 'Harper Government' trying to tell us something subliminally? Has Canada, entering into the China - Canada Foreign Investment Protection Act changed things that much, that Canada is no longer a nation - state in its own right any longer? I guess we will never know, since the details are secret! Now we know why they are secret?

Peace Tower aspect and details totally wrong...

Error II: Peace tower detail in security strip inaccurate and wrong! Get a peeper and if you are very young and of good eye sight you will be able to see the error(s). The observation windows under the clock face are distorted and not in the right place! The second deck of observation windows are missing! And under this is missing much stone work detail. (and the griffins and gargoyles don't match...) This image certainly was not done by Canada Banknote!

Poppy colour and leave shape wrong...

Error III:  The poppies (?) on the reverse (i.e. the back of) are not the correct colour! And the leaves that are displayed to the left of the banknote are not correct to the poppy of "Flanders Field" . Of which the correct scientific name is: Papaver rhoeas I have included a link so that it can be corrected at a later date? Or not...

Vimy Memorial  -  Aspect ratio's incorrect...

Error IV: Now we are getting into the real serious and bad stuff. On the reverse of the new twenty dollar bill is an image of the Vimy Memorial. Now we all know how the ' Harper Government' loves to milk the the war stuff. How it is the best friends of all war veterans, well, at least until you actually require the services you are entitled to! So the Oracle of Ottawa would think that the image of the Vimy Memorial would be the last thing that would have to be worried about! But the Oracle of Ottawa was wrong again! And you don't even need a peeper.  The image included is clickable and can be enlarged. Compare it with the image on your new twenty dollar note. The aspect ratio is wrong, i.e. it is distorted, isn't it?

Vimy Memorial - Nipples on females of wrong ethnic group...
Error V: The Oracle of Ottawa has also heard that the new twenty dollar bill is the first one that has naked breasts on it! Well, the Oracle of Ottawa must inform you that you would be wrong! Check all the Canadian Banknotes before 1954 very carefully. It seems clear to the Oracle of Ottawa that Canadian men prior to 1954 were big breast men through and through. But that is not the problem. And yes, the girls on the Vimy Memorial are naked and showing their "titties"! I mean how bold is that? But if you enlarge the picture and check out the nipples, you will find that the said features are very fine and dainty, perfectly characteristic of the sculptor using French models as was most certainly the case as the Memorial was fashioned in London, England. If you get a peeper and check out the nipples on the back of the new twenty, you see that the naked nymphs are sporting monster Latina Woman nipples! Now the Oracle of Ottawa has figured out how this mistake of proportion could have possibly happened. You see the contractor that did the image was located in Calgary or Edmonton, which is most deficient in fine featured French girls. So the little contractor went to his basement and woke up three pretty Columbia Latina's currently working at a Tim Horton's in Calgary as temporary foreign workers! Q.E.D.

Does this match what's in your wallet?

No comments:

Post a Comment