Ludwig Wittgenstein, Philosophical Grammar, p. 171
It was all the news today here in Canada. It was announced by the chromed domed eminence himself, along with his most trusted spin doctors and fart catchers assorted, that one of the long lost ships of the doomed and tragic Franklin Expedition had been located somewhere up in Northern Canada south of King William Island. The first thing that struck the Oracle of Ottawa was how could they make that claim with out even having dived the wreck, which later in the day was announced to be in only eleven meters of water!
|Sir John Franklin - As insane as Stephen Harper?|
It all started to unravel around 5:00 p.m. when the momentous discovery was discussed on Power and Politics on CBC Newsworld. The majority of the panel was less than impressed. There were very many questions. Such as how does this useless unchecked "discovery" make my life as a Canadian any better? Will it speed up the delivery of my unemployment check? Will it bring critically needed home services to Veterans that have recently been gutted by the 'Harper Government' ? Will it make the lives of the survivors of missing and murdered aboriginal women any better? Will it allow home door to door mail delivery to continue? No? Then what the fuck is it good for? And how in hell can you call finding the remains of a colossal failure very much not unlike your own as 'Nation Building' ?
It is going to look pretty bad if that hulk is not one of the two Franklin Expedition ships. It has totally shocked the Oracle of Ottawa that Parks Canada has not its homework on this one. The two expedition ships of the Franklin Expedition were known as bomb vessels. Do you know Dear Reader how many of these were built by and for the Royal Navy in the 19th century? The list is very long indeed. There were at least one hundred ships of this class constructed! Do you know Dear Reader how many expeditions were sent to look for Franklin in the 19th century alone - Twenty at least! And not to mention how many of these vessels were used by the Hudson Bay Company to supply their outposts into the 20th century!
But it was the communications genius of Geoff Norquay (a total sack of crap..) on hire from Earnscliffe Strategy Group that let all the cats out of the bag, on air, in real time. The little whippersnapper from the NDP mentioned that instead of looking for Franklins long lost remains it would have been more intelligent to be doing serious mapping for all the international boundary commissions that Canada will have to attend to defend its present borders in the next two years. Geoff Norquay rolled his eyes knowingly nearly into the back of his head and stated that there has been a serious amount of mapping done to locate Franklins trash. Then the young NDP lad stated that that mapping is over five hundred miles useless from the area where mapping was most required! It was killer Dear Reader and no doubt Geoff Norquays last screw up on the PMO dime.