Allan Fotheringham, Fotheringham's Fictionary, p. 221
Memo from the Sports Desk:
Ottawa, sadly, is a small town in more respects then one. It will not be often that the Oracle of Ottawa will comment on childrens games played by men. If you have grown up in Canada and are over fifty years old you know by now that hockey is disgusting and depraved. The chance that your kid will play in the NHL is less, much less then 1 : 100,000. If your kid at thirteen has a hat size greater then 5 1/2 get him in the chess club! Cause he ain't gonna be a hero or an NHL hockey player! Give thanks to your God.
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| Mike Fisher |
Here in Ottawa we are about half way through Winterlude. The big winter festival worked on all year by practically all "n" levels of government. And it does not humm along all year, but rather gnashes to the finish line each year. The only reason it gets across the finish line is that one percenter employee that carries the whole damn rotten works. Hardly surprising if you have lived here most all your life.
The recent news of the Ottawa Senators pulling the huge and insane trade of Mike Fisher to Nashville in the middle of Winterlude proves my point of the gnashing theory...The Ottawa Senator Brain Trust had more than enough time, according to local media, to hold off the trade, maybe even shop it out some more, and do it after Winterlude ends! But no sports fan the gnashing continues... or rather, to use local media wording, the deconstruction continues.
An NHL franchise, even in a small market, is a lot like a beef feed lot operation or a horse stud farm. You don't trade off your best stud(s) whenever your shorts bind! Mike fisher has played all his 55 games this year so far! He has scored 14 - 15 goals, right on track! What is really going on here? Mike Fisher and the wife, Carrie Underwood are freaking Ottawa Royalty, ask anyone in Ottawa. They are loved.
Who is going all the way to the Stanley Cup this year? Nashville! If your a betting person you know about "long props" At the end of last years Stanley Cup the numbers go up at all the big Vegas sport books for next years winner. There is no doubt in this reporters mind that Nashville's number just got a lot smaller and Ottawas got a lot larger! As of late last week many credit cards in Ottawa just got maxed out on the long props in several Vegas sport books.
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| Carrie Underwood, Total Class... |
Its a lock! Mike and the wife will now have more time for "married relations" in that big four poster bed with Carrie singing "I Gotta Be Me ! " at the top of her lungs. I see dynasty! And I wish I was joking, but I am not.
The real problem in Bytown folks, is management! The guy they should have gotten rid of along time ago is the seedy old guy with that creepy lisp!
The real problem with Mike Fisher and Carrie Underwood is youth and beauty. Management can't remember their youth and they never had beauty.! Mike and Carrie's only sin is that they totally outclassed management and in Ottawa that is certain death.
This video reminds me of Mike and Carrie, a real true couple, management in Ottawa hates that!
Enjoy!
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