The Blossomng Of Justin Trudeau

We see things around us change, arise and pass away; they or their condition, must therefore have a cause.
Immanuel Kant, Critique Of Pure Reason, First Edition-1781, p. 330

Politics is a lot like pure bred horse racing or world class track and field. You can pretty much tell the outcome of the event by the mysterious quality of what horse handicappers call form. And the election that was kicked off yesterday for Canada's 42 Parliament is and will be further truth and confirmation of the mystery of form.

Justin Trudeau - Hits The Ground Running.

It was while watching the At Issue Panel on Sunday night that the Oracle of Ottawa heard the best news of the year so far. The word has gotten out that the young Justin had a drag out, no holds barred,
flat out brawl with the spin doctors and the fart catchers. Justin won. The fart catchers and spin doctors are locked up in a room, in a basement, somewhere in Ottawa, until the end of the election. The Oracle of Ottawa has been convinced that spread among the little bastards in short pants were several planted spies from the PMO of the evil 'Harper Government'.

The end results are included in the above news footage, just as the Oracle of Ottawa saw it in his secure bunker, somewhere in Ottawa South. Gone was the girlish choirboy vocal fry. Justin Trudeau's balls have finally dropped! Everything is possible now, anything can be won, everything will be done. And he took questions, not just five questions, with no supplementals, Justin answered all their questions until there were no more questions... The Oracle of Ottawa can't help but observe that the young Justin has the natural stump knack, he just really loves it, Thoughts of Obama and Clinton could not be escaped.

Meanwhile, several hours earlier, Angry Tom Mulcair held the weirdest campaign launch that the Oracle of Ottawa has ever witnessed in his life so far. There is no video of it on You Tube 24 hours latter. There were no questions at all, even worse than Harper!! Everyone in Ottawa was scratching their heads and asking "What the fuck was that?".  The more I watch this opportunistic actor the more I am beginning to worry about the actual future of the NDP at the Federal level. It was the most Stalinist political event the Oracle of Ottawa has ever observed in his life.

Last and least is a video clip from the evil ole Steve Harper of the soon to be defunct ' Harper Government'. It was all so creepy and eerie that the Oracle of Ottawa was convinced that Darth Vader himself would appear through the doors at any moment. There were five pre vented questions allowed, with no supplementals. What kind of democracy do you call that? You can tell from the body language that Harper just hates campaigning. You should look at his first appearance in Mount Royal latter in the day. He is afraid of the people. He is thinking and greatly afraid that someone will actually know what he has truly in store for the ordinary Canadians and that they will suddenly turn on him and string him up while the security helps with the noose! He apparently has that dream a lot...  

At the time of this writing it is only Day 2 of the great marathon. Justin Trudeau was really kicking up the excitement in Steve Harper's Calgary riding! Angry Tom Mulcair was no where to be found. NDP officials stated that he was preparing for the Thursday debate. The Oracle of Ottawa has heard the rumor that he is actually at Stornaway in an induced coma, under going a Geritol drip to get him on his feet for Thursday....The campaign continues.

Alison Redford - How The West Was Really Won

All our reasonings concerning the probability of causes are founded on the transferring of past to future.
David Hume, A Treatise of Human Nature, p. 137

The wailing and gnashing of teeth and dentures, complete with the nervous soiling of Depends, continues unabated in the upper suites of the national Conservative Bund. How could this possibly happen? Well the Oracle of Ottawa did some thinking and a little research, as the Thinking About Thinking project continues unabated, and has come to several preliminary conclusions.

Alberta wildrose...

The Oracle of Ottawa likes Alison Redford. This is the kind of candidate that the Oracle of Ottawa just loves to vote for. I have included a link, check out the resume! But as impressive as all that is, we know that something else is at the end of the day required. It is the vision thing, stupid! Alison Redford's greatest strength is that she knows that the world does not just exist at a very small point in the center of her head. She also knows that the world is much bigger then her mere field of view as provided by her own eyesight. She knows that the world exists beyond Calgary city limits. She knows that the world exists beyond the borders of the Province of Alberta. And that there is a very big world outside the comfortable confines of the boundary's of Canada. And she has played all over the global playground. And she has a learned a few things...

Stampede - Bust out...

The most powerful tool in the Redford arsenal is that she has learned how to jam the "Cowboy Rules" that governs all macho endeavours in matters of business and politics as persued in the Province of Alberta. I can recite the first four rules from memory. I picked them up while watching Sun News TV! Rule 1: Never complain, Rule 2: Never explain, Rule 3: Never apologize, and Rule 4: Always ride for the brand! I apologize for not remembering the rest of them.... Damn!! The Oracle of Ottawa will never get to be a Cowboy!! 

In today's modern world the most important tool and talent of the leader in public life is the great and rare quality of conciliation. This is not an attribute commonly found among rectum sniffing type A alpha dogs! And we have had quite a run of those in Alberta haven't we? Alison Redford is the first bright emission of a point of light since Peter Lougheed!


Now, the Oracle of Ottawa figured that if Alison pulled victory from the arena, the ground could possibly experience a tremor or two. Holy God shuddering trots! It has been days now, and yes, the ground is still transmitting aftershocks here in Ottawa! Damn! You'd have thought that Alison pulled on her Moses robe, grabbed her staff of Almighty God, flooded the Trans Canada highway east bound and lead all the Newfoundlanders and Cape Brettoner contractors from the oil sand works, and was leading them to their respective Promised Lands! Let My People Gooooo....

Danielle Smith...

The Oracle of Ottawa must caution Ms. Redford that she has stirred up evil forces. The severity of it has even astounded the Oracle of Ottawa. The secured bunker, located somewhere in Ottawa - South, is on double lock-down! The first ominous sign is the lack of no sounds or signs that this event has even happened! The second sign is the immediate low attack(s) originating from the Sun News network. With assertions that you have concluded a corrupt deal with one or more labour unions! The Oracle of Ottawa wonders how this is different from cutting a deal with one or several trans national corporations? The Tory sweats here in Ottawa have no answer for that question....


The other great evil that worries the Oracle of Ottawa is that Wildrose Party, and especially the leader, one Danielle Smith. What a creepy piece of work! She makes Krista Erickson look like Mother Teresa! Why the Oracle of Ottawa had no idea that Darth Vader had a daughter!

On The Peasants Republic Of China

Will a man rob God?
Malachi, Chapter 3, Verse 8, Line 1, (NKJV)

Well, She Wrong is long gone. According to the Globe & Mail she bailed to a Chinese aircraft in the dead of night sometime last Tuesday. Back to visit her "husband" (i.e. controller) for a debrief, or rather a vacation...If the Canadian public only knew how far up the Conservatives colon these peasants really are there would be people in the streets. And no doubt sometime in the near future there will be. The Oracle of Ottawa can assure his dear readers that this will keep going off ever louder and more intense until the back benchers unaffected by the "ricer" malady start crossing the floor to sit with the Liberals and the NDP!

She Wrong - Pulling cultural rehab...

All is not going to unfold as planned by the Prime Ministers Office, believe me! There is going to be that very embarrassing revelation of the height of that China town "gateway" when it is discovered that it is slightly higher than the Canadian War Memorial! Someone did take the time to measure, didn't they? Which bungling minister allowed this to happen? Oh my! Really? Then there will be no doubt some sharp little NDP bunny that will actually do the research into the International Law of the implications of said monstrosity gate way. If you have your text of Grotius handy you might want to start flipping through it...

As the Oracle of Ottawa suspected out loud in an earlier post, She Wrongs husband is back in China. And no doubt gives less than a roaches ass of what his now old lady is up to at the Golden Mountain. A a matter of fact he is probably pissed that his free time on the town as nearly single is over for a little while! That is one marriage license that we will no doubt ever get to see. What do you think?

Another wrench to soon fall in the gear box....

As the Oracle of Ottawa has lamented in past posts, he is constantly miffed by all the bullshit in the media that China is going to rule the world! The Shen Yun thingies are at my local mall again, flogging me this show which I find really annoying. If it was so good, they wouldn't have to give the tickets away in malls! I still believe that it is all a PRC cultural propaganda ploy. It is in reality a total fail and a royal waste of every ones time.Perhaps one should read the old fashioned Chinese warriors for some understanding of how the future will soon unfold...

The actual reality in mainland peasant ville is that the old guard party members can hardly keep there Depends dry. Reports from the Middle East have them in an utter panic. That nightmare of the peasants rising up and hanging said old party hacks off of light standards in the street is frequently recurring...Picture an old Chinese guy driving on the Freeway for the first time! Yes that is pretty dangerous.

On The Fat Cats Of Ottawa

It's an important and popular fact that things are not always what they seem.
Douglas Adams, The Hitchhikers Guide To the Galaxy, (film)

It is one of the most common myths in Canada that Ottawa is the home of fat cats. As per all rumors propagated by the Conservative Party of Canada this fact is grossly exaggerated! For all the peoples that have lived in the Ottawa area who descend back to the time before Ottawa replaced Bytown, having a fat cat in the house was considered a tactful display and sign of prosperity and benevolence. There is nothing like a fat happy cat in a home. Why would anyone resent that?

Junior says "I am not fat, just big boned..."

 Many fat cats are very deceiving due just to the first conclusion and observation by guests and strangers. The biggest misconception is that all fat cats are sickly and soft. If the said fat cat is a country cat, just outside of the modern City Limits, this is usually the first fatal error! Reality and the pet test will soon confirm that many fat cats are in fact as hard as a steel utility pole! And that everything beyond the diet kibbles was caught by the said fat cat with his own skills and feline expertise! Many rural residents report that after "dinner" there fat cats always want to go out to the nearest field to get the remaining five courses!

Junior says "The dog and the tory's can eat later..."

Another depressing popular misconception is that all fat cats are micro-controlling rage heads that are never for a moment at peace with the world or themselves. These fat cats would like to dispel that myth by reminding all peoples from outside Ottawa that not all cats are resident of 24 Sussex Drive. Please update your Rolodex!

Junior says "I know how to live..."

The most fatal mistake that a stranger can make is holding the stereotype that all fat cats are sluggish, slow and stupid. Fat cats greatly resent this. You don't get chewed up by Kingfishers and Badgers on a regular basis due to the fact that you are trying to rip their dinner off by being sluggish, slow and stupid. An amazing amount of fat cats have incredible speed.... Be careful.

Junior says "I,m  WHAT...??!!"

So for all you newbies that are just passing through the fair city of Ottawa getting your little corporate whore career card stamped on your pathetic road to oblivion, beware of making the wrong conclusions in any dealings with the fat cats of Ottawa!

Here is a tune that all cats can enjoy.....

Jason Kenney - Math Check For A Genius

But if nothing does as well as something which nothing can be said, it vanishes. 
Simon Blackburn, Think, p. 173

Oh! The plans of mice and Conservatives! The fart catchers and spin doctors worked so hard on the arrangements. A perfect venue was picked, and the minister had just shaved, so there would be no five o'clock shadow for at least forty five minutes! Yes Sir! The Right Dubious member from Calgary Southeast  was ready to drop a total bombshell! The folks at home must have red meat! Preferably 60 day aged Black Angus beef! And it must somehow still be dripping of the very life essence of some poor left leaning shmucks, no doubt from Central Canada, frog or bloke makes no difference!

Jason Kenney - Is that MY pizza?

But alas, the good minister was eclipsed by breaking news. Yet, Sun News TV stuck to the Cowboy Rules and rode for the brand! Giving the poor thing a few moments of pity time! Hurry up speak faster, everyone wants to watch The Murdoch Show! Well even for Jason Kenney, it didn't take long for him to tell the cameras, that there are 1,800 people in Canada that should not be in Canada and by golly gosh darn we are going to catch the evil doers and banish them to wander in the desert of the Alberta Badlands. Membership to the bulrush club optional! Ignore all burning bushes! It is no doubt another leaking pipeline! The Oracle of Ottawa was totally bewildered. The message was...? But it got better!

Eat ME Jason - Ya know you wanna!

It was a double bill today! The slippery, but not yet totally slimy Minister of Public Safety Vic Toews, with a face that looks like a vagina with handle-bars, put down a double barrel blast that fifty suspected war criminals were possibly in Canada and that the pictures and names would be released on a Canadian Government web site. So that the peers of the tribal refugees could lynch their more successful neighbours and have an easy out to get away with the whole thing! An election promise is an election promise!

The West Wants In...

But alas! The reality is nowhere near the hype! Last year Canada accepted 250,000 new Canadians. Lets say that the average for the last ten years has been 200,000. Now do the math. Eighteen hundred divided by two million, times one 'undred gives an answer of : ) 0.09%! That means the civil servants that Jason and Tony "Two Tier" want to fire and contract out, get the selection process correct 99.91% of the time! You would think a guy that hung around with Jesuits at the University of San Francisco could figure this out. But Jason Kenney was so smart they couldn't teach him a damn thing!

Another bull shit snore fest. Yaaaaawwwwnnnnnn!!!