The Symbolism of Denis 'Winky' Lebel

Ethereal temper, massy, large and round,
Behind him cast; the broad circumference
John Milton, Paradise Lost, Book I, Lines 285-286

Denis 'Winky' Lebel is the present Minister of Transport in the present 'Harper Government'. When you have to put "actors" like this in the cabinet, it is easy to understand the perpetual gag order on all ministers of the Crown as enforced by the Prime Ministers Office. Now the Oracle of Ottawa is not saying the minister is shakey,  but holy shit, is this guy ever shakey! If you were forced due to regional considerations to stick this in your cabinet, you can easily understand how even a pig could get bags under its eyes!

Winky at home with the wife and kids...

 Now most Canadians would expect the Minister of Transport to be at least an engineer, or the former CEO of one of the great Canadian  railways. You know, something in that vain of experience. But what do we have today? Why we have the former mayor of Roberval, Quebec! Or as is he is known in the petit ville, the seigneur of all the habitants he sees! And before d'at, taber whet, he run the only Hotel in da town! A modern day seigneur, mode zee! And don't you forget d'at!

Well the world in Ottawa on the Hill is a totally different world. We never had feudalism in Ontario as recently as Quebec has had, i.e. right into the 20th century. And the problems and the issues that turn up each and every day are just so much more complicated than anything you would encounter back in Roberval. And you can tell when you watch the Minister stand to his seat in Question Period that he is most all the time over whelmed.

So much over whelmed that he has one the most gut splitting tells the Oracle of Ottawa has ever witnessed of  anyone in Canadian public life, (so far...). It appears that when the hapless Minister has got his micro-dick caught in the pencil sharpener, so to speak, his left eye, (your right on television) starts to twitch uncontrollably. The Oracle of Ottawa knows it is cruel, but it has me rolling on the floor in insane uncontrollable laughter.

It all reminds the Oracle of Ottawa of a greasy old strip club waiter back in Portage du Fort who was just desperate to do this new exotic Asian stripper at the club. Well he finally got to do her doggy in the store room, and as he was getting his "freak" on, that eye started to twitch... and as he was getting to the short strokes, he thought as a man of the world, that he would provide some stimulation to the clitoral region only to find out that the exotic creature was a she-male.... "I didn't know, but it feel so good, I couldn't stop...."

You can't make this stuff up.....

'Harper Government' - Showing Early Onset Wheel Wobble ?

Not everyone is worth listening to.
Alain de Botton, The Consolations of Philosophy, p. 33

If only the present members of the Conservative Party of Canada spent as much time in the Library of Parliament as they do at the members cafeteria and other assorted deep troughs that Ottawa has to offer, Canada would be experiencing a golden age not seen since Classical Greece! The Oracle of Ottawa can only go on what he has observed this week from the daily Question Period tapes and from the media releases. And it is such early days, and already the wheels are starting to wobble on several shaky wagons. It has all come as a real shock to the Oracle of Ottawa.

Mr. Creosote does dinner....

Most of the cracks are beginning to appear in the front row of the cabinet ministers! One of the most glaring is that of poor James Moore,  the ever enlarging, of late, Minister of Canadian Heritage. Is it just me, or is the brightest bulb in the wallmart cabinet transforming into Mr. Creosote before our very eyes? As far as I can tell it all seemed to start at the big victory convention held in Ottawa last summer. The mouth breathing hicks from out west started on him about being too liberal. And dissing Miss Krista on that Sun News TV interview. What of course they were really telling Jimmy was that he was getting way too popular! Poor James is in reality a hell of great guy. The Oracle of Ottawa can tell. A grand Liberal born into a backbiting, grasping, backstabbing Tory world. I figure when the heat gets turned up good and high he will cross or sit as an independent. The Opposition I am sure are keeping a list and they are checking it more than twice.

All queer art - back to the darkest vaults!

Then there is the horizontally challenged Minister of Labour. With her face becoming more ashen and fuller by the day, along with the desperate need for a fashion coach not to mention a personal trainer! Who would have thought the being at the top was ten times worse than the ride up? Welcome to Ottawa Minister! And the press! They are worse than a blood hound after an escaped convict!

Now we come to the Health Minister, who already has that glazed "deer in the headlights" look. What is this poor thing going to do when it gets real hot? Ottawa is no place for the challenged of cerebral density! It is not near a hundred days and already you can detect the jumpiness at Question Period. Not a good sign!

As the Bach recording is coming to an end so must this missive. And I have saved the worst till the last. Of course I am referring to our vertically challenged leprechaun of finance. When a Minister of the Crown is breaking into tears at a press meeting, the wheels are soon to come right off! (Ottawa Sun, Saturday, October, 22 2011, p. 18)  But all this was brought on by the said Minister himself. Those damn Europeans don't appreciate little bogy's from the colony's telling them in public how to run their business! He just can't understand it! He always shows up with the smartest central bank governor in tow, like a Fisher-Price pull toy on a real short string! Why doesn't any one love me? The best advice which I am sure I am not the first to offer is : SHUT THE FUCK UP JIMMY!!!! It is always much better to let people assume you are a git fool, without opening your mouth and constantly confirming it! It is no secret that the Minister hates unions, especially members of that god damned European Union!!

In closing, the Oracle of Ottawa must comment on the front page story on today's Ottawa Citizen, concerning the return of art works to the Art Bank of Canada now in various government offices throughout Ottawa. It seems that the "homo-erotic" works of one Evergon are being called in as if their present locations are going to serve as the Canadian Papal Nuncio in the near future! Nothing is further from the truth! All the said "home-erotic" works are being fought over fiercely by three secretly gay Ministers of the Crown, which of course must go un-named.....

A little plug and reality check of the vengeful Gods truth-tellers!!