His lustre visibly impar'd; yet seemed Undaunted. John Milton, Paradise Lost, Book IV, Lines 850-851
Well dear readers, it is the night before Question Period of the resumed session. And all through the House not creature is stirring, not even a redundant Public Works mouse... Enough of that. The Oracle of Ottawa will save the rest for the suitable time of the year. Even the original Nazi Bund all those years ago couldn't fight on two fronts, but the 'Harper Government' is opening up more fronts than an obsessive compulsive back bencher with a multiple personality disorder. Even the Oracle of Ottawa is surprised how fast the 'Harper Government' is getting to the self immolation phase of there awesome majority government!
Ye want fries with that Buck-o?
Lord thunder'in Jesus bye! Did you see that state broadcaster footage of that cock faced minister in Truro, Nova Scotia handle the locals and the press as they all but nearly rose up to lynch him? The Oracle of Ottawa loved every moment. It is no doubt at the time of this writing that it is finally dawning on one of the trots at the Prime Ministers Office that the people that are going to be affected the most by the new draconian changes to Employment Insurance are all located in the riding's of the Conservatives! Opps! Why, it is in all those rural riding's that exist all the entre-pren-whore fruit growers, berry plantations, and other labor intensive sweat holes that utterly live or die on the ready availability of "rent-a-darkies"! Or more commonly known to you and I as the Guest Worker Program. It seems that the bugged eyed minister of "human disasters" is going to cut back on these possible terrorist guest workers in favor of the laid off suits from the closest Canadian metropolitan area!
Well all the Oracle of Ottawa can tell you little agricultural entre-pren-whores is that you better have a very large extended family available come the fall! Or you might as well plow the whole freak'in lot under right now. It is about time I suppose that the Tory Bund is going to introduce its strongest supporters to the Ricardian theory of international trade! Yes sir Bubbha! You can bet your last exploited guest worker that at the same moment that the bug-eyed minister of "Human Resources" was announcing the last of your cheap labor source that several American and Mexican fruit wholesalers are loading up the fridges to cut your grass come this fall and winter! Now I hope you can take your introduction to the new opportunity rich world of globalization with the same aplomb as the people from the rust belt that was once southern Ontario.
Here are most of the details, good luck with that!!
The life insurance industry is filled with good people who believe in their work and their companies, but who may never have challenged the assumptions underlying their efforts. Andrew Tobias, The Invisible Bankers, Everything The Insurance Industry Never Wanted You To Know, p. 65
It all starts at the earliest school experience. The rights of private property and how capitalism is the most efficient system ever devised. You have get them young. You pretty much buy-in to all the propaganda, since you have nothing to compare it to, and any alternatives are certainly not allowed to be discussed. Soon you are out in the real world, and you start to notice things aren't quite right.
For example, there are three burger joints in your "hood" and they are always empty most of the time. Think of that carbon foot print for a moment! You crawl on saturated freeways, full of empty cars, all really going no where in particular. You fly on business, and notice that there is a constant line of half or emptier jets all going to the same place. Now you start to wonder at the plain insanity of deregulation, and pondering back to 9/11 on and of the wisdom of deregulation, and the brilliance of "open skies" Great idea that was...
Soon the factory you work for is ripping the machines from the floor and shipping them to Mexico or China. Your worthless globalized ass is now unemployed. You have paid into employment insurance for years and now you have to apply for it! What the fuck kind of insult is that? The Oracle of Ottawa has a future solution for this. And it will no doubt happen when the NDP forms government. Or sooner than you think!
Soon to be just a bad memory.....
The solution is a Crown Corporation for Employment Insurance. From your first job, you are their most important client! All the money you pay for your employment insurance goes to Employment Insurance Canada. There mission is to protect you and help you to realize your maximum potential over the period of your working life. When you become unemployed, your first check will be in the mail automatically! No waiting period crap. You will also find information in the envelope of all the "out services" you can access right fuck'in NOW! Just like the pigs in suits! This will include several re-trainings over your working life...
Now, the mandate of Employment Insurance Canada is pretty wide open and the lads are ready to keep it wide open. For example due to such the large "group" of all the workers in Canada EIC will be able to offer insurance pretty cheap. Soon they will be offering full insurance packages and allied services.(i.e. estate planning..) For example you will be able to get life insurance, real cheap and very sweet. Of course the corporate pigs now selling insurance won't be nationalized, we the workers will enjoy watching them starve to death one by one!
Of course some of them will find little low profit niches that will allow them minimum wage. Capitalism in the clean up mode. Capitalism at the service of the people who created it and is supposed to serve. Now as time progresses, Workers Compensation and Canada Pension integrates into Employment Insurance Canada, with constitutional safeguards and protections. After-all the 19th century was two centuries ago....
Most people hope that history in their lifetime will unfold in a gently upward linear line. There goes the Oracle of Ottawa confusing yesterday with today again. I was thinking of all the better things of yesterday and my mind crashed into insurance. Remember all the choice one had? Where oh where have all the Canadian insurance companies gone? Gone to corporate consolidation, every one...Many of the great and grand Canadian insurance companies of the past were set up explicitly to provide insurance at a reasonable rate for the "insureds" and the "annuitants", these companies were owned by their policy holders. Do you ever remember one of those grand old companies dragging or stiffing a payout? Thought so, neither do I...
What insurance should be...
Then around the 1980's it seemed that the snot nosed MBA geeks thought it would be a great idea to takeover by any means possible all these stiff competitors. And many started to vanish into the maws of the colossal corporate whores. If you want to follow along just go to Wikipedia and check out the List of Canadian insurance companies. Pretty interesting isn't it? If by chance you are an old school insurance nerd you will probably add the missing ones, I know the list is not complete and thanks in advance!
If you are the average-joe, anywhere in North America and especially in Canada you must have noticed the nasty turn of attitude and events with your corporate insurer. Upon reflection, I noticed a real change after 9/11, but the reason upon even more dangerous reflection had nothing really to do with it. This was also the time that the corporate colossal whores were just then discovering that selling insurance to asian barbarians, just out of their rice paddies is a very hard dollar indeed! Not to mention the the ever increasing grease required for the local party officials! But Canadian corporate insurance companies are a lot like American Republicans digging a hole, when it starts to fall in on you, you don't quit, you just go and get a bigger shovel!
Well guess what? You and I here in Canada are the shovels! Flattered? No?
Maritime Insurance -1786 -
In recent years this has caused a silent wall of horror stories in the large insured corporate groups here in Canada. It seems that the snot nosed geeks discovered that you could boost the bottom line by corrupting the people in the benefits office and splitting the huge difference with the guilty parties...Like when you take over from a competent insurer and then charge more for the life insurance and then lower the coverage without letting the insured know! If you not cheating your not trying, right? Then harass the life insurance holders with the smoking coverage, that they are paying a premium for, until they no longer respond and use that as the reason to charge more and lower the coverage again! (cover me...Lord) But the real gold is in the long term disability coverage! If you can get away without paying for the cancer types and the queers that go a downer because of terminal Aids you have a virtual gold mine! Especially if the group is over 10,000 members in size! The snot nosed geeks figured out a sure fire method here to.
N. Bowditch, The first American actuary...
What you do is simple and plain on the surface. You get all those worthless goners with cancer and Aids that are surely sandbagging the system and you require them to get their doctors and specialists to write up an essay on and about what was done on each visit! Of course the medical types have no time for this and when the required "essays" are not coming in you simply cut off the "insureds" pay and or benefits! Brilliant! They will usaully commit suicide all by themselves. Results? Bottom line fat as hell! Make sure all the "accomplices" get a free week end at that water front cottage! If you can corrupt the union garbage, bonus, let them have a taste to! LOL!! Too easy! (cover me...Lord)
But what is an honest man to do today? Well, the Oracle of Ottawa will not only bitch, but he will provide you with some good practical tips to survive the snake pit of corporate insurers. First thing, take only the absolute minimum from your employer. For decades this was the best deal for the average Canadian, but sadly this is no longer true. Do you have a father or mother, brother, sister or uncle, aunt that is a an Anglican Minister or an Ontario School teacher? Or is your spouse a federal or provincial civil servant? Investigate these insurance options. If you are not from this slice of the social strata fear not...
Investigate Fraternal Orders! They have excellent insurance! For example the Independent Order of Foresters! Another Fraternal order that I discovered and was really surprised by was the Knights of Columbus! They not only sell insurance but hold the highest A. M. Best rating, one of only two in all of Canada!! I always thought that they only held great fiddle contests and wicked bean suppers! It seems that the best insurance deals are discovered not marketed and sold!! Good luck and if you know of any other excellent deals in this mode pleases leave a comment!!
Who knew? The Knights are kicking insurance ass...way better than corporate insurance??
